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Never before has the phrase DIY being so apt – if any of the candidates were to ever offer anyone their handyman (or handywoman) services I would certainly advise them to go for the “Do It Yourself” option based on what we witnessed in last night’s episode of the Apprentice.

This was the task billed to the candidates as “getting your hands dirty” where each of the teams had two days to set up a handyman business, advertise their services, quote on two opportunities Lord Sugar had set up and make as much profit as possible from doing odd jobs.

Lord Sugar knew quite a few people had experience in this sector so he appointed Elle (an operations executive for a construction company) as captain of team Versatile and Brett (a builder) as captain of team Connexus.

Whilst Sam was no doubt still pondering the decision to wear black socks with his steel toe cap boots or go for the blue ones, Elle was busy, very busy in fact, pouring over the wording of their promotional flyer. So much so that she missed the print deadline resulting in no flyers for team Versatile.

Mergim took the initiative to produce and put up some hand written flyers. Everyone seemed to take issue with this as a lack of professionalism, however, I say hats off to him for trying to at least do something when his project manager had fallen at the first hurdle.

Cue the capers of painting shop fronts (which included over painting the shop signage – Mergim), “screwing a nail” into the wall to produce a sloping, swinging, decidedly dodgy shelf (Mergim), producing the worst painted floor I have ever seen (my 4 year old and 2 year old could have done a significantly better job) which when completed was greeted by high 5’s and “great job” (really???). Then we had industrial clothing rails cut to the wrong length (David) and the hilariousness of Scott getting carried away and offering to clear out a garden and build a structural retaining wall in 24 hours. Thankfully the client’s expectations were brought back to earth with a bang by Vana and the client ended up with a tidy, weed and rubbish free, garden which she happily paid for.

Versatile’s saving grace was Joseph, the owner of a plumbing business, who looked like the only candidate who has ever done anything practical in his life and carried team Versatile through the installation of clothing rails at the Theatre Royal with aplomb.

So back into the Boardroom (where Lord Sugar’s pun writer must have been on holiday for this week’s episode) and cue the bloodbath…..

Connexus were the winners having made a profit of £1050 compared to Versatile’s £530. Lord Sugar went straight for Elle asking her about her day job and what she actually does on a building site as nothing along those lines had been apparent from her performance. Elle was trying to say that others would do the logistics, but Lord Sugar was having none of it and in an unprecedented step he fired Elle straight off without even bringing her and two others back in as per the usual format.

It seemed Lord Sugar wanted to make this an episode of “firsts” and he then took another unprecedented step of announcing he was so pleased with Joseph’s performance that he was staying and was not allowed to be brought back into the boardroom. Lord Sugar then pointed his finger at Mergim and said as sub team leader he had to choose who to bring back in with him…and April (let’s do some more market research instead of actually doing and finding odd jobs) and David (is that 1017mm or 1170mm for that pole length) were the (not so) unlucky ones to accompany Mergim back into the Boardroom.

April was accused of not pulling her weight and hiding in the background (repeatedly and not just on this task), David was accused of not being up to scratch and showing a lack of common sense (a cutting comment from Karen who was still in disbelief at Mergim’s comment of “screwing in a nail”) and Mergim put in a passionate plea about his refugee to millionaire dream.

Alas it was to no avail and Megrim was also fired (two for the price of one), albeit with an unusual “we will stay in touch” from Lord Sugar, which I have never heard before either, and a message never to give up on his dream. But Lord Sugar was not finished there and the firing of April swiftly followed leaving a nervous looking David (much like he has been for most of the series whether in a challenge or the Boardroom) wondering if he was to be the 4th. However, Lord Sugar took a deep breath and dispatched him back to the house with a comment about describing himself on his CV as a “diamond”….a “non-shining diamond at that” according to Lord Sugar. And then there were 10…